AM I SAFE? A Private Pilot’s Advice to Avoiding Bravery Burnout

Brenè Brown tells us, “Choose courage over comfort.” Being brave is the standard. We must always strive to lean into our values. And, here we are, enduring the ultimate test as we navigate a pandemic of epic proportions. Personal demands are on the rise, and many of us have been bravely answering the call, likely longer than our capabilities allow. We’re reaching the point of bravery burnout. Now, more than ever, it’s crucial to build in some self-care checks to stay tuned in to our mind, body, and spirit. For private pilots, this is second nature. We know the stakes are high every time we fly. So we do a self-assessment before any flight. We use a mnemonic to help us remember all the factors to check: AM I SAFE? I indeed used this mnemonic every time I chose to fly, working my way down the list: How am I doing?… AM I SAFE?

It recently occurred to me that I would do well to use this checklist in my daily life, especially before digging into a taxing project or providing help or comfort to a friend or family member in need. Frankly, I’ve been “flying under dangerous conditions” as I’ve stretched myself thin, trying to be brave and answer the demands placed on me, my family, and friends. I haven’t been taking stock to see how I am doing amid all the unrest.

With each new day, there is always a chance to reset. And given that today is the tomorrow I promised myself, I’m going to start asking myself every day: AM I SAFE? So, what does AM I SAFE mean for a pilot? Let’s talk about it and then see how it applies to our everyday lives.

Alcohol (or drugs). Alcohol — Although legal limits vary by jurisdiction, a pilot should consider their alcohol consumption in the last 8 to 24 hours before a flight. As someone who has struggled with abusing alcohol to cope with stress and anxiety, I can tell you excessive alcohol use does not prepare you for safe flying — or good livin’. My doctor calls alcohol a payday loan. It gets you through a tough time, but will always come back on payday, taking far more from your reserves than you can afford to give. Check out Annie’s Alchohol Experiment if you’re interested in reducing your alcohol intake and breaking the slave cycle of needing a drink to cope.

Medication — Is the pilot currently taking any drugs (prescription or over-the-counter)? Have you recently started taking medications that need time to take effect? Do any of your medications impede your ability to show up 100%? There’s nothing wrong with tapping out until your physiological well-being is better managed or until you are done taking a drug that might impede your ability to fly safely (or live well).

Illness — Is the pilot suffering from any illness or symptom of an illness which might affect them in flight? If yes, the pilot should seriously consider postponing that flight or mitigating that factor to ensure a safe flight.

In the same vein, sometimes we struggle with depression and anxiety, yet we fail to seek medical treatment. Or we try to push through by talking to friends.

Would you try to treat cancer only by the love of a friend? I think not! And if you want to have a fighting chance, the same goes for mental illnesses. Seek help from a professional to get to the heart of your issue and get better. Check out this Talkspace resource, where you can get online counseling if you want to focus on getting better in this area.

Stress — Is the pilot overly worried about other factors in their life? The psychological pressures of everyday living can be a powerful distraction and consequently affect a pilot’s performance. This question translates directly to everyday life. There has to be a cutoff for how much stress we know we can endure before we call off a flight.

Or before we back out of a commitment. Knowing and honoring our limits can mean the difference between thriving, a mental breakdown, or even worse, death. If you’d like some help coping with stress, why not try out this great CALM app. There are tons of great resources to help reduce stress and increase well-being.

Courtesy of AirFacts

Attitude — Pilots can get themselves into hazardous situations when they don’t have the right attitude. A pilot should honestly assess why they want to go flying that day. Is it for the pure love of flight that brought us all to earn our wings? Or are we trying to escape or prove something?

Many plane crashes, including the worst plane crash in aviation history, have been attributed to a pilot not maintaining the right attitude for flying. Perhaps they flew longer than the FAA day allows, or flew hungover, or during questionable weather conditions. We lose sight of the terrible repercussions of not being safe in exchange for just getting home. In aviation, we call this “Get-there-itis”. This common pilot killer definitely translates to daily life.

Perhaps there’s one more event that you feel obligated to attend or even present. You can see the finish line, and you push yourself past your boundaries to get there. Sometimes this works out, but oftentimes it doesn’t work out, and we’re, at best, flying by the seat of our pants as we try to get home, or worse, end up compromising our health and well-being trying to push past our limits. Just don’t risk it. Tap out when conditions call for it and get to the finish line when the time is right.

We must understand our purpose and keep that steadfast in our hearts. Otherwise, factors like ego, self-pity, fear will hinder how we show up every day. If you’d like a good gut check on attitude, check out Mr. Rick Rigsby and what he learned from a 3rd-grade dropout. This talk changed my mindest on how I’m living my life. As a pilot, I wouldn’t think twice about landing and then asking myself how the flight went. Mr. Rigsby will help you do the same thing with life. You’ll definitely leave that talk asking yourself, “How am I living?”

Sometimes, we are so emotionally taxed for so long that it starts to feel normal!

Fatigue — Has the pilot had sufficient sleep and adequate nutrition? I have come to realize the importance sleep has on your wellness. And nutrition is the fuel that keeps you going. As a pilot, we are keenly aware of the quality of our fuel. We don’t just pull up to a gas station and fuel up. We check the quality of the fuel in our tanks before we ever take off and fly. Why should it be any different for our bodies? We should eat and sleep to live and thrive. If you’d like to learn more about good nutrition and overall health habits, check out Healthline Nutrition.

Emotion — Overall well-being is essential to being a fully present pilot. Grief over the loss of a loved one, or a breakup, or a big fight with a spouse, weighs on us heavily. Consider this as an essential factor before embarking on any significant work or personal life events. Sometimes, we are so emotionally taxed for so long that it starts to feel normal. If we don’t check that, we will most certainly breakdown, and that could occur at any time. A pilot certainly doesn’t want to have that happen while making an approach at a busy airport. Our life and the life of our passengers depends on it. The stakes indeed could be that high for you in your daily life as well. If you’d like more information on coping with grief, check out the Center for Complicated Grief.

To close, I leave you with a quote cherished by general aviation enthusiasts: “It’s better to be on the ground and wish you were flying than to be flying and wish you were on the ground.” As we all weather the storm of COVID-19, it is tempting to stretch our boundaries for others’ good or because we simply love flying. But before you embark on that task of caring for another person, even someone you love dearly, ask yourself, AM I SAFE? Being brave and giving back is genuinely best done when we’ve honored our boundaries and lived within those safe operating parameters.

Victoria Reeve is a lucky wife, retired Naval Officer, and a passionate driver of cultural transformation. She has led multifunctional teams across the world, where she gathered valuable lessons along the way. It is Victoria’s passion to give back to others and hold space for those who are eager to improve themselves and the teams they lead. Find her at underway leadership.com

Information regarding AM I SAFE is paraphrased and taken from the Federal Aviation Administration (FAA) Code Federal Regulations (CFR):